GIRLS, GUITARS, GATLING GUNS Jimmy Boom Semtex poems

GIRLS, GUITARS, GATLING GUNS

Jimmy Boom Semtex

The Human Body

You can do so much with it

Bury it under the patio

Fry it with onions and herbs

Splice it with wood working tools

Drive a truck over it

Throw it off a bridge

Weight it in the river

Pour acid all over it

Or you can artily tattoo it

Put piercings into it

Brand it like a moo cow

Wear nice nail varnish

Inherit your dad's bloodlust

And chop up your sister

Like you did your mum

For you are strange

Human form joys

Behold the facts

Just like the news

All as depressing as Hell

Told as stories in books

Sang as odes in songs

Flashed upon the big screen

Eerily whispered in folk tales

All about the human body

One if which is ours

Unless you're a dictator

Then you own a million

You Did

We went to the house where you were staying.

There was myself, my mate, you and your mate.

We were only teens aged 16-19.

What did we know back then?

I knew next to nothing except music and planes.

We went to the shop and got our beer.

Drinking all night and watching trash horror.

Later, we all slept.

My mate with your mate, upstairs.

She had a sexy body and was pretty.

Yet she had the local attitude.

Nothing happened.

You were the big one and another local one.

I left school 18 months before.

My maths teacher said:

Don't let me hear of you getting anyone pregnant on someone's living room floor.

That's exactly what I did with you.

Or so you said when we met on that dark night.

I was with one of my mates and you were with gobshite.

You told me the news.

I said get rid of it.

You said no.

That was that.

Still is.

How different it would have been if you were nice and I loved you.

I never liked the Wet WetWet lyrics you wrote me.

I liked The Bangles.

And wanted an alternative gal.

Not a local slapper.

Of course, none of it matters now.

Except to me.

I did everything wrong back then.

Not anymore.

I survived your brother.

I survived my strict mother.

I survived my street racing car crash.

I survived the fights.

I survived the bullies.

I survived myself.

I survived the wrong job.

I survived darkness you caused.

All for what?

To live...

Thesis

The teenage child went to his friend's to do his thesis.

This was the excuse for everything and anything.

Drinking lots of dirty beer.

Consuming two bottles of brandy.

Smoking fucking weed.

If it's going to the strip club to get laid.

Or to the tattooist for underage ink.

Or having sex with his friend's mum's sister.

Or going on a road trip in a stolen car.

All these and more are classed as thesis.

I wonder if I can get away with it?

Doing my theses.

Off to see my mistress!

Thesis, an excuse for all things nawty.

********'s Cold

The girl gave the guy a cold

A real damn fucking stinker

It clogged his nose

Blocked his airways

Stopped his breathing

Watered his eyes

Itched his nose

Tightened his chest

Reddened his face

Pissed him off

Stopped his hard on

Bunged up his arse

And pissed him off

Till he was in a coffin

All because he got ********'s cold

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